Pemulis (oh no!) woke up to a seventy-third consecutive day of non-stop rain. This was less than ideal because so much rain had fallen -- and was continuing to fall -- that, although it was mid-May in what is essentially southern France, and with no sun to help dry the rain away, Grenoble (and as Pemulis understood it, most of Europe) was transformed into almost a Waterworld-like fantasy land not all that unlike Disneyland Paris (but with more people around). While Pemulis had not gone to the extremes that some of his French neighbors had gone, which included purchasing cold-water SCUBA gear to navigate the newly formed Venice-like world of Grenoble with its (also Dutch-like) canals replacing the former cobblestoned and dog shit-ridden streets, or reverted to a 17th century dialect of French spoken by the classic French pirates such as Pierre le Grand (who cut a hole in his own boat to inspire his fellow pirates to fight all the harder as if they did not capture the attacked ship they would have no means of retreat or survival) or Bernard Desjean, the Baron of Pointis: "Parsambleu! T'as du doublon pour un pot de pétun?" ([meaningless pirate exclamation]!; do you have any money for some tobacco?). He had, however -- due to necessity -- begun taking the Bateaux Mouches to get to work (imported from Paris) but could no longer read during his morning and evening commutes due to the excessive noise and commotion caused by his fellow passengers who for some inexplicable reason had all become heavy rum drinkers which in turn led to even more old time French pirate talk and at least several scuffles that broke out daily. Most of these tussles seemed to grow from disputes that seemed to centre principally around where one could find proper lumber for constructing first-rate peg legs.
Eventually, on a certain morning that coincided with the seventy-third consecutive day of non-stop rain, Pemulis found himself on the Bateau Mouche on his way to visit his friend Gately who thus far had not been suffering the pirate-like delirium effects of most of the other citizens. As Pemulis kept his head down throughout another (rather intense) fight between two groups of youths who were arguing about the proper pronunciation of "Tijuana" (one side wanted "Tiajuana"), and a flying bottle of Captain Morgan's rum (the only kind that anyone seemed to drink) nearly hit him in the head, he decided that enough was enough.
Pemulis gave up on his original plan to visit Gately, and instead got off at the government communications office stop (the only location left where phone calls could be made). He put in a call to other major cities throughout the world to try to find out the local situations. He tried Istanbul but understood that things were even worse there. He then tried Toronto. He then quickly tried a random city in his haste to hang up with Toronto. Finally he tried Munich and they said that no one there was speaking like a 17th century pirate, people only drank beer (there was only one store where rum could be found and it was only open on sundays), and the sun was shining. So Pemulis swam home, found Joelle at the neighbors (where all in attendance were training the old lady on the 4th floor's new parrot), chose a few choice items (the Syntia and his bike that had been in storage since the great flood outbreak, for example), and took the next gondola towards Germany.
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